Cozy up to your significant other and watch these TED Talks for couples!
I have a lot to thank blogging for, from the incredible connections I’ve made to opportunities I’ve gotten that I didn’t even know I wanted to figuring out my worth, helping to improve my writing and so much more. In addition to that, blogging is what introduced me to TED Talks.
About three years ago, someone emailed me about reviewing a book. I turn a lot of these down because most are on topics that I’m not interested in, but this email invited me to review a book by Brittany Gibbons, a fellow blogger who admittedly I had never heard of. Her book, Fat Girl Walking, is a collection of stories from her life, including body-image issues and dealing with anxiety. Her life online led her to be invited to do a TED Talk, and this was the first time I had ever heard of TED Talks. After watching hers, I started watching others, and from then, I was hooked.
TED Talks are one of my favorite ways to start the morning. I have the app on my phone, and I have a list of TED Talks in my queue to watch. I also like to rewatch some of the ones that really inspired me in the past. If you’re unfamiliar with TED Talks, you can read more about them here.
TED Talks cover a number of different topics, literally anything you could think of (and even some things you haven’t though of), there’s probably a TED Talk about it. The ones I share in this TED Talks for couples post aren’t all necessarily geared toward couples, but I believe they will help empower your relationship by making you think a little differently, whether that be by showing empathy, accepting and celebrating your differences, allowing yourself to let your walls, down. etc.
THE POWER OF VULNERABILITY – BRENE BROWN
This is by far my favorite TED Talk that I’ve ever watched. I’ve listened to it at least 15 times, and I continuously recommend it to friends. In this TED Talk, Brene Brown talks about connection, emphasizing that connection is the reason why we’re here. She talks about the years of research she did about human connection, and through her studies, she found that the people who felt a sense of worth, love, and belonging were the people who believed they’re worthy of those things. Then she breaks down how and why those people had that belief. A big part of it had to do with their willingness to embrace vulnerability because vulnerability, while it opens you up to things like shame and grief, it’s also the birthplace of love, joy, and gratitude.
One of the biggest factor in a successful relationship is communication, and even if you’re like me, and you struggle with opening yourself up and being vulnerable, it’s essential part of a relationship. When you allow yourself to be vulnerable with your partner, you’re also giving yourself the opportunity to feel all the good stuff too.
WHY I’M DONE TRYING TO BE “MAN ENOUGH” – JUSTIN BALDONI
Justin Baldoni is an actor most known for his role on the TV series, Jane the Virgin. In his TED Talk, he encourages the audience to redefine masculinity. At a young age, children are put into boxes – if you’re a girl, you like ponies and glitter and the color pink; if you’re a boy, you like sports and monster trucks. Boys are told to “man up” or “rub some dirt in it.” They’re discouraged when it comes to showing their sensitivity or vulnerability. Justin Baldoni wants to change that, and he shares a personal anecdote that shows the power of this redefinition.
3 WAYS TO BUILD A HAPPY MARRIAGE AND AVOID DIVORCE – GEORGE BLAIR-WEST
George Blair-West is a psychiatrist from Australia, and in this talk he discusses how to have relationships that last. He briefly discusses the differences in perspective between generation X and millennials and how that’s changed how people view relationships and marriage. He also talks about things for you to think about and consider before entering a relationship and things to evaluate while you’re dating a potential life partner. He emphasizes that the factors he discusses are things that you can look for, but if there are issues, you can also work on them together.
WHY WE ALL NEED TO PRACTICE EMOTIONAL FIRST AID – GUY WINCH
Psychologist Guy Winch discusses the unfortunate truth of how people tend to focus on their physical health, but too many people ignore their psychological health. He discusses the importance of practicing emotional first aid because this will not only help you treat these psychological wounds, but it will also help you recognize when you have them.
When you’re in physical pain, it’s obvious, and we’re taught how to perform first aid. If you’re bleeding, you wash the wound and put a band-aid on it. Easy. But when it comes to psychological wounds, they’re so much harder to treat. Things like loneliness, failure, and rejection can actually distort your perceptions and mislead you. If you accidentally cut yourself, you don’t take a knife and try to make it deeper; you try to treat the wound. But when we have psychological injuries, instead of trying to fix them, we tend to deepen our wounds by convincing ourselves we’re getting what we deserve or that the world is working against us. Winch encourages the audience to work on recognizing when we have psychological wounds and practice emotional first aid to treat them, not make them worse.
FALLING IN LOVE IS THE EASY PART – MANDY LEN CATRON
Mandy Len Catron tried an experiment based on study that had people ask 36 questions, each one getting more intimate the more questions you asked. From this experiment, she fell in love, wrote a blog post about it, and got international attention. The study wasn’t for finding love; the point was to create a deeper, more meaningful relationships. People continuously asked if she and her boyfriend were still together.
Catron talks about how, like the title suggests, falling in love is the easy part. Staying in love is the hard part. Choosing to be together and dealing with things like doubt and trust are the tough parts and what makes it terrifying, but at the same time, it makes relationship more rewarding because at the end of the day and every day, you’re constantly choosing to stay together.
TECHNOLOGY HASN’T CHANGED LOVE. HERE’S WHY. – HELEN FISHER
Helen Fisher is an anthropologist who has studied romantic love for several years. She talks about how there is an assumption that technology has changed how people fall in love, with things like texting and Tinder, but at the end of the day, technology has nothing to do with how people fall in love. Her studies of people and relationships have proven that the way people fall in love has to do with the brain, and technology isn’t something that’s changed that. She talks about how people fall in love and enter marriage and relationships has changed and why. She also invites psychologist Esther Perel to give a different perspective on the subject.
WHAT YOU DON’T KNOW ABOUT MARRIAGE – JENNA MCCARTHY
In this cheeky and fun TED Talk, writer Jenna McCarthy takes a comical approach to discuss a few factors that make marriage work, including focusing on the positive, and also a few things to avoid, like winning an Oscar. She discusses how even with the statistics and some negative things that come along with marriage, there are so many amazing reasons to get married to someone who you genuinely love and want to spend the rest of your life with.
What are some of your favorite TED Talks?
